Mother Knows Best... sometimes...

How often do you make a comment in passing not realising the impact it might really have?

This postcard; which I saw on the PostSecret blog this afternoon reminded me of the countless times I've heard women comment on the influence their mothers unknowingly had on their lives. The little things their mothers never knew they did that upset them.

"Oh, you've put on weight since I saw you last"

"Are you really that hungry?"

"You're sister has such beautiful skin"

"Why don't you (sing, run, work, dance, do anything...) like your sister/brother"

"You're so much like your father"

Most of the time comments such as these are said without the intention of causing hurt but intention or not, they hurt. Moreso than causing hurt, these comments stick with us, in the back of our minds and every time we doubt ourselves these are the things we remember.

"My mum thinks I'm fat."

"I shouldn't eat that, Mum would be horrified."

"My sister is so much more beautiful than me, no wonder noone ever looks at me."

"I can't sing (run, work, dance, do anything) well."

"Mum hates Dad, she's never said anything good about him, she must hate me too."

There's one truth, as children, we know above all others; mother knows best. So if our own mother believes all these bad things about us they must be true, she wouldn't say it if they weren't, right?

If your mother ever said anything like this to you, she probably didn't mean it, probably meant well in fact. Maybe she just wasn't thinking about what she was saying. Most importantly, she was wrong; sometimes we all are.

As a child it may well have been true that our mothers knew us better than anyone else, as adults that no longer holds true. Go out and create your own truths; eat with joy, sing loudly, celebrate your beauty and be proud of the ways you are like your father, he wasn't all bad either.