You Make Me Vomit In My Mouth...

Miranda Devine; your "hard hitting" journalism is little more than trash talk of the over opinionated, under informed minority... The rest of us just can't drag ourselves away from witnessing such an amazing train wreck as your columns inevitably turn out to be.



I've not had cause to come across the words of Ms Devine for some time and today when a friend mentioned her disgust in Devine I couldn't help but think "No! Stop! Don't do it, you know you don't want to go looking for that article!" Alas, a couple of facebook status updates later the article "Buying a Baby - not a pair of shoes" was highlighted and I'm sure it won't be the last time I hear of it.


"WHEN Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban announced the surprise birth of their new baby this week, they made special mention of “our gestational carrier”.

First it must be said that relating opinions to the personal experiences of people one doesn't even know is a new all time low. To then go on and speak of accessory babies as if Faith Margaret is regarded as a new bag rather than a much loved babe who's mother did not have the good fortune to be able to carry her in her own womb is lower than the slime still being scraped from flood wrought streets across the country. 'Though Kidman is renowned (and much maligned) for "keeping Mum" about her private life the one thing that she has been quite open about is that she has suffered miscarriages, she has faced infertility issues and that she has yearned deeply to grow her much loved family. That Faith Margaret was brought into the arms of her loving parents via one of the most generous acts of service that any woman can offer another is nothing short of a miracle, certainly it is not a "fad" for the majority of those couples fortunate enough to have been granted this gift.

Yes, I said "gift"; it is a little snippet of common vernacular that a baby is referred to as a "gift" or a "blessing" so when a newspaper article states that the son of Sir Elton John and David Furnish was “the perfect gift for the men who have everything” we need to accept it for what it is, a term commonly used in modern society. John and Furnish did not make the statement themselves and clearly celebrities do not have vetting rights on newspaper articles (do they Miranda?) I'm sure Zachary Jackson Levin would've been the perfect "gift" for his parents whether they were men who had everything, women who had nothing or a combination of both and regardless of whether he was carried by his biological mother, surrogate mother or gestational carrier.

"Accessory babies ... with all the annoying, messy, time-consuming, inconvenient and tedious bits of parenthood outsourced to donors, clinics, rental wombs..."


These remarks demonstrate ignorance of the highest degree. I can not imagine any woman who would exchange the "annoying, messy" parts of conception, pregnancy and child birth (those "outsourced to donors, clinics, rental wombs") for years of infertility, failed infertility treatments, recurrent miscarriages and ultimately, without a gestational carrier, a childless life. Not to mention living for the first 9 months of your child's life with the uncertainty that the gestational carrier might not do everything in her power to conduct her life in the best interests of your child according to your wishes, might abscond with your child rather than fulfill her obligations as a gestational carrier or, possibly worse, that the gestational carrier herself may not be able to successfully carry your child.

I don't believe I'm mistaken in stating that surely "rental womb" is a far more clinical and insulting term for surrogacy than "gestational carrier". "Rental womb" implies that the "surrogate mother" (as Devine would seem to prefer) is baring the child only for monetary gain, that monetary gain can make up for the life long impact of child baring on her body, heart and soul. At first glance "gestational carrier" may seem cold or distancing (in not using the term "mother") take a moment to consider however that if you were in the position to need a gestational carrier distance from the process that has been thrust upon you by fate may be precisely what you need to get through it, to grow into the best mother you can be. In reality the term "gestational carrier" means nothing less than "pregnant woman" and every pregnant mother is a "gestational carrier". To take the terminology into full consideration we must remember that "surrogate" means "alternate", "replacement" or "stand-in". I know I would hate to refer to anyone else as my child's "replacement mother" and I'd hate to be referred to as a babe's "stand-in mother".

"The outsourcing process will lead to the commodification of children, as if they are just another boutique item to be acquired by the wealthy or fabulously entitled - and just as easily discarded."

To relate the "outsourcing process" for designer babies (parented by the minority of IVF clients) to the hardships faced by parents who choose to engage a donor, clinic and or gestational carrier as a very last resort, again show's Devine's ignorance and indeed lack of compassion for anyone different to herself. That is, if I can assume that Ms Devine has never faced any of the multitude of issues faced by women who have to fight harder for their dream of having a family than simply having sex with their husband, boyfriend or lover. Perhaps a "hard hitting" journalist would have more integrity if she offered educated opinions?